Wednesday 17 August 2022

Remembering George

Four weeks ago today, my sister and I spent a most pleasant couple of hours at The Water Rat in Ripon, in the always delightful company of George and Lilian Pickles. We had not seen them since 2019, and I am so, so very glad we had the chance to meet again this year, because George died on Sunday morning.

I learnt of his death by an email one of his daughters sent me yesterday: 

"I’m sorry to let you know that my dad passed away very suddenly, but peacefully during the early hours of Sunday morning. 

I know he thought very highly of you and thoroughly enjoyed your company on your very recent visit, and all the other times too."

It was a shock to me, but imagine how much worse it must have been (and still is) for Lilian and all the family. George was in his 80s, but he looked as well and fit as ever when we met.  

There is so much - and all of it good - I could write here about George; he and Lilian certainly are among the loveliest people I have ever met. We hit it off immediately; no such thing as a generation gap or different nationalities stopping us from becoming friends.

My sister and I have always admired how the two of them were still so obviously in love and treated each other with humour and respect. Their wit and humour were contagious, but they also knew how to address serious things, and we always covered a wide range of subjects both in our emails and in our conversations.

Before I go on and on, let me direct you to this older post of mine, where you can read George in his own words.

His last email to me is from the 1st of August (Yorkshire Day!). He wrote, among other things:

So, so glad you got home safe. Lilian and I were thinking about you none stop for a couple of days. Watching the TV news for the latest on the rail strikes. 
Reading your email makes us realise what a hell of a journey you had getting back home. You must be absolutely shattered.
Let’s make up for all this next time you come. We will have that evening at the RAFA club and I will give our daughters and son advanced notice to make sure you meet at least some of them.

That evening at the club will now never take place. I miss George and his emails, and making plans for future meetings. Ripon has lost a good man who cared for the place and was interested in what was going on, but Lilian and the family have lost a wonderful husband and great dad.

George and Lilian*

June 2021
 

* When George included pictures in his emails to me, he always said I was welcome to use them here on my blog.

34 comments:

  1. This is a lovely post. It will feel strange going back to Ripon next year without meeting George and Lilian. By the way, I always keep the wooden penny in my handbag.
    Meike's sister

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    1. Yes, it will feel odd not to put "lunch at Water Rat with G & L" in my diary next year :-(
      Hopefully, we'll still somehow be able to meet Lilian and other family members.
      I also still have the lucky wooden pennies - the original one and the jubilee one!

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  2. So sorry for your loss. George sounds a wonderful guy. The passing of a friend is always sad but your memories will remain with you.

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    1. George really was a lovely person, and I feel privileged to have counted him among my friends.
      The second friend I have lost this year :-(

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  3. I'm so very sorry for your loss, and sorry for George's family, too.

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    1. Thank you, Jennifer. It must be devastating for them.

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  4. So sorry for your loss, George sounded like a wonderful man.

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  5. I am glad that you had a chance to see him on your visit this year. Sounds like a fine man and I enjoyed reading about him and his days as the Ripon Hornblower.

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    1. Thank you, Ellen. Yes, imagine we would not have met up this year and then learnt of his passing.
      His memoirs would make great reading!

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  6. How heartbreaking for his family and for you. Clearly, he was a lovely man. Your post serves as a small eulogy to his kindness, intelligence and deep love of his family and friends. My condolences on the loss of a dear friend.

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    1. Thank you, Mary. What his wife and children with their families are going through right now must be devastating. I could have gone on and on but chose to keep my post relatively short.

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  7. A terrible shock to happen so suddenly. We never know what is around the corner, especially when older.

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    1. So true, Tasker. My husband died completely out of the blue only 5 days after he turned 41, with no forewarning such as an illness or underlying condition. That was a terrible shock, too; and it is no less terrible when the person was in their 80s.

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  8. Death and loss are so sad and the timing never feels right. I'm glad you had such a lovely person as a friend , sounds like he'll be remembered by many.
    Alison in Wales x

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    1. Thank you, Alison. He was something of a public figure in Ripon and as popular as he was well known.

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  9. How sad - especially for the family of course, but losing a friend always changes one's world a bit as well. You'll be able to look back and be glad that you did get the chance to meet him again not long before he passed away, though. I do remember reading about him and the hornblowing tradition in Ripon on your blog more than once.

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    1. Yes, he provided me with photos and ideas for my blog several times, for instance Pancake race: https://librarianwithsecrets.blogspot.com/2017/02/a-kind-of-guest-post-pancake-day.html
      I may live far away from Ripon and the Pickles family, but you are right; losing George has changed my world, too.

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  10. A nice tribute to George and good memories.

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    1. Thank you, Rachel. I could have written a lot more but decided to keep it short(-ish).

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  11. What a wonderful way to be remembered; I hope your friend's family sees your post, and that recording and sharing your most recent memories of him are a bit of a comfort to you.

    Ceci

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    1. Thank you, Ceci. The daughter who notified me of George's death has already seen the post, I let her know about it as soon as I'd published it.

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  12. Please accept my condolences for the loss of this wonderful friend.

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  13. They were certainly a lovely couple and I'm sure this unexpected passing is hard to understand for many. I see he was ex-RAF, both my late parents were also also. May George rest in peace in a better place, and always be remembered for the happiness he obviously brought to family and friends.

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    1. Thank you, Mary. I keep checking The Ripon Gazette online for an obituary, but there is none so far, which really puzzles me.

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  14. What a beautiful post. I read it and had to go and spend a while doing my current jigsaw to compose myself and reply. I think that many of us would wish to pass away in that manner (although, of course, we have no choice) but it then comes as a shock for those left behind.

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    1. Yes, we would all want to go like this, wouldn‘t we. Steve often said that it was his biggest fear that I would die before him. To know that his biggest fear did not come true was comforting to me.

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  15. Such a lovely tribute to what sounds like a really lovely guy, really special. I actually got quite emotional - entirely out of character. We are so lucky that some people come into our lives, and stay a little. It will be odd going back without him - I am so sorry.

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    1. Thank you, Mike. Somehow it still feels unreal. Yes, we are lucky to have some people accompany us in our lives for a while. Some leave a lasting impression regardless of how long we have known them.

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  16. Oh, I am sorry to hear of his passing. Thank goodness that you and your sister visited when you did! I think it might give his family comfort to know how happy he was for your visit, your friendship. I hope that makes sense. 2020 and 2021 were not open for much visiting. I never met George but I sincerely wish that I could have. What a lovely, dear man you have told us about!

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    1. You would have gotten along greatly, Kay, I am sure of that!
      Yes, my sister and I are grateful that we did meet with George and Lilian this year - having of course no idea that it was going to be the last time we would see him.

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  17. I loved reading the Horn Blower post. George sounds lovely and his loss will clearly be felt!

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    1. It still feels a bit unreal. Especially now that Queen Elizabeth has died, I keep expecting an email from George, telling me about how people in Ripon have been reacting to the sad news.

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